I guess you're wondering, why I'm writing in English again. Well, at first I wanted to sound sophisticated but actually I do not want to forget my English. And if i had written in Estonian my thought would be from wall-to-wall and it would have taken forever to finally finish blogging. I know there are some friends who peek my blog but they do not understand it because it is in Estonian. And beside, I love to do something new sometimes :)
Although this week has just began, it has been so eye-opening to me. Like you can see from the headline I'm going to talk about "lies" and "lying."
Why did i ever think that my friends would not lie to me? It's so freaking mind-blowing that those "friends" just used me to get something they needed and others who I simply thought are my acquaintance where the ones who really cared about me and protected me behind my back. And when I start to think about it, then my "friends" really have called/ talked/ visited me when they need something for themselves. I can't blame them because it is typical that friends help each other but they just used me like I was some free public-service!! And those vulgar and nasty lies that was told! Did I really believed those? Is my life really so soul-destroying ( what a fancy sweet word) that I crab every piece of word as a savior from hell? I'm happy beside my child but when I'm not near her the word crashes me with it's negativity and absorbs the happiness out of me. ( i'm so deep today, right).
I know that i hate when my loved ones lie to me but if they themselves say that they despise liars but he himself lies to me like it's nothing serious. Where is the point? Even if he did not do anything wrong why should he twist the truth? Or there is something shameful behind it? See what my mind does to me? I have mentioned that I have very vivid thoughts.
I was inspired and I am so proud of myself that I did something so beautiful. I know i'm not great but i'm trying my best and I'm improving myself when I have some free time. Drawing lets me just be and express myself. It makes me feel as happy as watching my child smiling.
See? I'm smiling again! Talking everything off my chest and from my mind makes me feel so light again. Like a new page in a book.
But sweeties, enjoy the beautiful spring, find time for your loved ones and just smile. Smiling is the best way to feel good (K)
No comments:
Post a Comment